the talk of nursing homes has usually been about affording them, whether to purchase insurance, etc. We have a different problem.
In june my mother was living on her own, totally capable of taking care of herself, but limited as she is 93. she started fainting and also vomiting and bleeding. Her doctor admitted her to hospital, rehydrated and wanted to send her home. he said bad things happen to people in their nineties in the hospital. The gastroenterologist order a colonoscopy, and that was the beginning of the end. she has been hosptialized or in rehab since then and grows more and more confused each day. not about her past, her family, etc, but about where she is. We get frantic calls at night that she doesn't know where she is supposed to sleep, that she is being evicted, etc. Anyhow, she is due to be released on Oct 4. They only give you two weeks notice and the problem is that nursing homes that promised rooms now say none are available. we have called at least 20 nursing homes, going over thirty miles from her home. We are prepared to pay the $10,000 a month and guarantee three years worth of payment, as they request, but they have a waiting list, some say a year wait.
What the heck do you do? My sister is taking a one month leave, we are calling these help at home agencies, that will cost at least $240 a day and who knows what will happen with my mother and a stranger in her home. My sisters all work, my mother wants to be near my one sister who is 58 and needs to work, and can't take a chance on giving up health insurance. I would find a place in Florida, but we all know my mother won't be separated from my one sister.
since mid june, someone from the family has been at the rehab or hospital either all day or in case of my sister, before work, after work til bedtime, and all weekend. We are all exhasted, one sister had a small stroke.
to top it off, our cousin's 34 year old daughter was killed Friday morning in a freak car accident, so everyone in family is in state of upset.