How the fight started
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplace
> expensive....so, I took her to a gas station..... and then the fight
> started....
>
> ************************************************** **********************
>
> After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
> Security. The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license
> to verify my age. I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my
> wallet at home. I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have
> to go home and come back later. The woman said, 'Unbutton your shirt'.
>
>
> So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair. She said, 'That
> silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me' and she processed my
> Social Security application.
>
> When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the
> Social Security office. She said, 'You should have dropped your pants.
> You might have gotten disability, too'
>
> And then the fight started.....
>
> ************************************************** *********************
> My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I
> kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a
> nearby table.
>
> My wife asked,' Do you know her?' 'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old
> girlfriend. I understand she took to drinking right after we split up
> those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.' 'My
> God!' says my wife, 'Who would think a person could go on celebrating
> that long?'
>
> And then the fight started.....
>
> ************************************************** *********************
> I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road
> and slowly the other driver got out of his car.
>
> You know how sometimes you just get soooo stressed and little things
> just seem funny?
>
> Yeah, well I couldn't believe it.... he was a DWARF!!!
>
> He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, 'I AM NOT
> HAPPY!!!'
>
> So, I looked down at him and said, 'Well, then which one are you?'
>
> And that's how the fight started.....
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